new blog :)

OK, so I am basically done with this blog for now :)
My focus is now on a new blog that I am doing to coincide with a bible study that I am doing with some of the team. So, if you ever want to check that one out it is:
http://kingdom-athletes.blogspot.com

Have a GREAT DAY!!!

laws of leadership...

I'm reading the 21 Laws of Leadership by John Maxwell. I have read it once before, when i was in college and trying to be a better captain, but different things mean different things at different points in your life. So, I am sure i got something out of it then, but I think i am getting much more out of it now!! I have always been incredibly intrigued with the subject of leadership, and could never get tired of talking, reading or learning about it. I think true, good leaders are few and far between, though many people mistakenly THINK that they are leaders. I believe all people fall in one of two categories-you're either a leader or a follower. Because there are far less leaders than followers in this world, that rare breed of person and how and why they are they way they are intrigues me. Anyway, I have just read a few chapters, but here are some of my favorite quotes so far....

• Champions don't become champions in the ring-they are merely recognized there.

• He who thinks he leads but has no followers, is only taking a walk.

• Being in power is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.

• You cant get too much done in life if you only work on the days when you feel good.

• The only thing that walks back from the tomb with the mourners and refuses to be buried is the character of a man. This is true. What a man is survives him. It can never be buried.

• To be conscious that you are ignorant of the facts is a great step to knowledge.

• You have achieved excellence as a leader when people will follow you everywhere if only out of curiousity.

• Titles dont have much value when it comes to leading. True leadership cannot be awarded, appointed, or assigned. It comes only from influence, and that can't be mandated. It must be earned.

• Its not the position that makes the leader; its the leader that makes the position.

As I read more, I'll randomly put up more quotes that i get from it. It is an awesome book!! I highly recommend!!

ear infection...

Riley got sick this weekend. It started with a bad day on Friday, the worst and longest night EVER Friday night, then trip to the dr first thing saturday morning, where we found out she had an ear infection. She got meds, and is great now, but we had a rough and exhausting couple days. She has never been sick like this. She got RSV at about 8 wks, but other than runny noses, she has never been sick since she's been 'BIG'. I know shes not really big, but she's older and aware of things, and not a little infant anymore. It was so hard watching her feel so bad. She was burning hot, couldnt get comfortable, didnt want to eat or drink, wanted to be held but didnt want to be touched kind of thing. Nothing satisfied her.

But, it did provide me with a 'mom moment'. Most of the time I dont really feel like a mom. Not really sure what its supposed to feel like, but i just dont feel like one most days. Normally, it just seems like i'm living life with this really cool little mini-me that wants to tag along for the ride and constantly help me work on my patience and selflessness :) But there are a rare few times, when something happens, and i feel like a mom.

My 'mom moment' came Friday night as I was laying on the floor in Riley's room. I stayed in there during the night, because it was useless trying to be in my bed knowing that i would be up every 5 mins. Riley was feeling so bad and was having chills and tossing and turning etc etc. So, at one point, probably around 2 am, I stood up to just rub her back to try to comfort her. She didnt want to be touched...but, she didnt want me to leave either. I was freezing cold, absolutely exhausted, standing at her crib watching her, and if i moved an inch away from her crib, she would start screaming for me. So as i was standing, i stated wondering why if she doesnt want me to touch her, why does she insist that i just stand here and watch her fall asleep??

And then a memory came to me of being young and being sick, and wanting my mom to sit on my bed until i fell asleep. I remember just being comforted knowing she was there...i didnt want her to touch me or talk to me, i just wanted to know she was there. And thats all Riley wanted...she just wanted to know that I was there...that HER MOM was there for her :) Just knowing i was there made her feel better in some small way. It made me feel like a real mom. And i didnt care if i had to stand there the rest of the night for her, i was going to do it, because thats what my mom would do for me.

So, it was a long weekend, but I think Jer and I both loved the feeling of being able to comfort our baby girl when she wasnt feeling well. Shes back in action now...loud as ever :) i love it...i love having my little mini-me feeling better and following me all around again :)

this will make you smile...

the following is a brief 30 second video of how daddy gets riley to wind down for bed every night :) its the highlight of the day...for sure, this video will make you smile... make sure you turn the volume up!

as you can see, there's lots of "winding down" going on here :)

first pony!

Our beautiful little girl has now officially sported her first pony-tail :) It wont stay up for very long because she will either pull it out or roll around and it will fall out, but its so fun to see even if just for a few minutes :) I had her look out the window and search for Beau so I could stand behind her and get a couple pics....shes growing so fast!!!!

Sleeping Riley

I put Riley in her crib this afternoon for a nap, and then went back downstairs to clean some things and had her video monitor turned on so i could see what she was doing. She finally settled down, and all was quiet, so I didnt pay too much attention anymore. After about 15 mins of quiet, i noticed that i still could not see her on the monitor. Thinking that maybe she had climbed out of her crib and hit or head or something, i went up to check on her. And thats when I saw the following, that I had to capture on video :)
It's a minute long and way way cute...




why she sleeps like this in her crib, but yet will not sleep in her car seat is BEYOND ME...probably wont do the carseat thing just because i want her to...oh well-i know that before too long, the carseat issue will be the least of my worries with this child :)

LOVE...

I went to a beautiful wedding last night. It was so great to see two people that I care about and think so much of, say their vows and confess their love. It was awesome.
As I was listening to the ceremony, my mind started going off (as it usually does) and a song popped in my head. My cousin, Sarah, will remember this one well, because we used to listen to this TAPE :) at the beach all the time when we were young...DC TALK (sarah could bust out the raps and not miss a beat-i tried :) ha!). Anyway, they have a song from long, long ago...LOVE IS A VERB. And, while I was sitting and listening, this song came to my mind and made me think...

The word love is thrown around so much. And I think people have just gotten in the habit of saying it. I am a big believer that actions speak so much louder than words. That is why, love truly is a verb. You can tell someone you love them, but do you SHOW that you love them? Is your love ACTIVE? See, I have a problem when someone says that they love me, and yet, they never SHOW it. And I think thats what happens in so many marriages...people begin to rest on the word, love....goodnight honey, love you...have a good day baby, love you...talk to you later, love you....And these end up just becoming stagnant words that are a part of a conversation, rather than a part of their lives. And then one day, they realize that they really dont FEEL love...they say it, but dont FEEL it. I believe that in order to recieve love, you have to give it...and not just in word-you show it. Dont ever become lazy in love...if you want to feel love, you have to give it. Whether it is with a spouse, or family member or friend...or even showing a stranger on the street the love of God, it has to be ACTIVE. You ACTIVATE love by giving yourself and your time, by asking them how they are, and really listening, by being interested in what they do and in their lives. There are so many ways to show love.

Love does not cost a thing...you cant wrap it in a gift. I think unfortunately alot of parents give their children THINGS as a substitution for love. They dont recognize that its a substitution for love, because they think that by buying them things, that shows them love-that it makes up for time when they havent been around for them. But, really, kids dont want things-they want your attention, your time, your silliness and fun...they want to know that they are worth your time and energy. A good example of love for me was this Christmas. Probably Riley's favorite gift this Christmas was a banana... my grandmama gave her two, and Riley was SO excited when she saw them. But the best thing was that my grandmama drove an hour down on the interstate-and she's old-to come and bring her those bananas. That is love. Grandmama could have mailed her a present or some money or whatever, but she drove an hour each way so that she could hand deliver her bananas and spend time with her. Her love was not just in words or in things, but in action-and that is real love.

One of my favorite passages in the bible is found in Romans 12. It says:
"Don't just pretend that you love others. Really love them....Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other" Rom 12:9,10 (My pastor, Ryan Wyatt, has an AWESOME message on this, which you could get off iTunes-abiding glory podcast if you're interested-its titled-Gifting Does Not Make a Leader). One thing he said in this message is that "Genuine love is not wearing a mask...its not fake". If you say you love someone...whomever that person may be-dont just say the words, mean it, show it...ACT on it!! If you are married, daily make a conscious effort to SHOW your love for your spouse...its not always easy to do, but it is so important!! If you say you love a friend or family member-be willing to show them that love...dont just say it before you hang up the phone as a habit, but back up those words with action!

So, my marriage advice and advice on any relationship that you want to be succeful and fulfilling is simply this...Make love genuine and always remember that LOVE IS A VERB!!

some quotes...

• Behind every excuse, is a lack of desire.

• Change is inevitable, growth is optional.

• ...the road back to God is a road of moral effort, of trying harder and harder. But in another sense it is not trying that is ever going to bring us home. All this trying leads up to the vital moment at which you turn to God and say, 'You must do this, I cant' ...

• Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is...You find out the strength of a wind by trying to walk against it, not lying down.

• A ship in the harbor is safe, but thats not why ships are built.

• A person of character finds a special attractiveness in difficulty since it is only by coming to grips with difficulty that he can realize his untapped potentials.

• “But from those who seemed to be something—whatever they were, it makes no difference to me; God shows personal favoritism to no man—for those who seemed to be something added nothing to me” Gal 2:6

• Pain is weakness leaving the body.

a minor stabbing...

Yesterday, I wanted to open one of Rileys new toys. So, I got a knife to do the deed. Those stupid toys are so hard to open. I was taking this knife and wedging it under the tie on the back of the box, thinking to myself that this was stupid and i really needed to get some scissors, but i didnt. The knife slipped and i literally stabbed myself on the base of my thumb.

If you know me at all, you know that i am AWFUL when it comes to blood, needles, doctors, hospitals. I will basically pass out if confronted with any of those 4 things. My mind is very strong and works itself up like no other. So, luckily Jeremy was home, and I went sprinting up the stairs yelling that i had just stabbed myself. Jeremy OBVIOUSLY thought i was exaggerating because he says, "let me get some neosporin....do we have any bandaids anywhere" .... to which i respond...."ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? THIS IS NOT A NEOSPORIN AND BAND-AIDS CUT!!!!!!!!!!!!" then i thought i was going to pass out. I laid on the ground and had a towel wrapped around my hand, with my hand raised in the air...i'm howling and saying i was going to pass out...was breaking out in a sweat...had jeremy take off my pants and shirt because i suddenly felt so hot. This yelling and commotion apparantly woke up riley. And so now, she starts screaming. I'm laying on the ground, half-naked, moaning with my hand wrapped in a towel bleeding very badly, riley is screaming...and poor jeremy was trying to figure out what he should do, while darting back and forth from me to Riley. So i told him to get Riley, he gets her, and she sees me and thinks i'm playing some funny game, so she comes running to me and lays on me and starts trying to pick me up and make me play with her. Little did she know that i was thinking in my head that i was literally about to lose consciousness from blood loss.

Luckily, Jeremy's mom lives 5mins away, so he called her over to help. I knew i needed stitches, but i HATE HOSPITALS and DID NOT WANT TO GO!!! So, then-amongst all the comotion, my BRILLIANT husband suddenly remembered, that perhaps, i could go to the training room where the lady vol athletes go, and see if our team doctor could take care of it for me there-which would bypass scary doctors and hospitals and waiting in the ER. So, we called the team trainer, Chris Hoffman, and she told me to come on in...Dr.Morgan, would meet me in the trng room and fix me up. I have never felt more BLESSED to have been an athlete here at UT...they REALLY take care of their athletes here...even when they arent athletes anymore!! Dr.Morgan will never EVER know how thankful I am for that...words just dont express!!

She took of the gauze jeremy had put on my hand...i didnt want to see it, so she did her stuff with me laying on my back and my hand out of my sight...jeremy stood where my feet were and held my other hand. Everything was going well until she Dr.Morgan starts with the numbing stuff and all the sudden goes, "OH SH*T...CHRIS GET ME A TOWEL..WE NEED A TOWEL", then Jeremy turns away, because he obviously cant look at it any longer. That's when i got hot and sweaty and almost passed out again. Apparantly, every time she put the needle in to squirt the numbing stuff, the blood would squirt out and it was pretty messy and she wasnt prepared for that amount of blood. (i'm starting to get sweaty just writing this)

But, then it was smooth from there :) I got numbed up and got 3 stitches. Dr.Morgan said i was VERY LUCKY because the cut was very deep and had the knife entered any slight bit of a different place it would have hit my tendon, which would have meant surgery. So, anyway, if any of you reading this blog, are going to ash's wedding this weekend, you will see my bandaged hand and know the story behind it!

So, now my hand is all swollen and bandaged. My fingers are fat and my thumb is blue-which doc said would happen because of how much blood i lost. I cant get it wet, so i didnt bath or shower yesterday, which makes me just feel gross and my hair greasy. Not to mention that life is a bit more difficult changing diapers with one hand on a squirmy kid that HATES diapers!!

But, praise God that it didnt hurt any nerves or tendons, and PRAISE GOD TIMES 810000 MLLION THAT I WAS A UT ATHLETE :) Never, have i been more thankful for that than yesterday :) And, while i'm thanking people, i'd like to give a shout-out to Judy Grubb-jeremy's mom-for sprinting over and watching riley, Jennie Grubb-jeremy's sister-for coming to help also with riley. My good friends Ellen and Rach-2 of the smartest people i know...both in the medical field and i frantically called both when i thought i was dying...and of course, a big thank you to Dr.Morgan and Chris Hoffman for saving the day...and the biggest thanks of all to THE SMARTEST MAN I KNOW...my husband-who didnt pass out, stayed calm, thought quickly of a great plan...and with the exception of the neosporin/band aid comment, was brilliant in crisis :)

What a day!